I’m thinking love Love, love, love More sweet than bitter.

So I finished Atlas of the Heart, the new book by Brene Brown about the eighty-seven emotions humans experience and how they effect our lives. I related to a lot of the passages, but was especially moved by Bittersweet.

The bittersweet side of appreciating life’s most precious moments is the unbearable awareness that those moments are passing.

Marc Parent, Believing It All

“Bittersweet is a mixed feeling of happiness and sadness,” as Dr. Brown defines it and I think I find it so poignant precisely because of the innate mix. It’s not positive or negative, but a combo, so that also makes it a confusing emotion.

I thought about this while driving down Old Cutler Road and passed by cars, trucks and vans decked out with balloons and painted up to celebrate Gulliver School’s Graduation. I can remember that feeling at my High School Graduation of happiness that I was finally finished, but sadness that I would never see these girls from my All Girl School, under these circumstances, again. “We may never pass this way again,” by Seals and Croft, was a popular song during my Senior Year at Lourdes and that song really summed up the transience of our experience.

I always got teary-eyed when my kids left one grade for another, but the one that really sticks in my mind was Christopher’s graduation from Kindergarten. I had volunteered a lot in his class, so knew the children and his wonderful teacher- Miss Citerella. I felt that bittersweet feeling on his last day, that my youngest child was moving from the protected cocoon of kindergaten to becoming a full-fledged first grader, with tests and assignments.

The kids in the class had each colored a page in a big book they made that illustrated Louis Armstrong’s song It’s a Wonderful World and, when they all sang it to the Kindergarten parents, there wasn’t a dry eye in the house. When Courtney, Christopher’s fiance, asked me a couple years ago what song I wanted to dance with Christopher to at their wedding, it only took a minute to realize It’s a Wonderful World was the perfect choice.

EATING OUT THIS WEEK IN MIAMI

We celebrated Emma’s birthday on Tuesday with dinner out at Terre Del Sapore. I met Emma when she was a shy little four year old; she turned 24 Tuesday. I posted a photo of her at my wedding as a flower girl and from her UM Graduation just last week, with the caption: “You’ve come a long way baby!” Of course, she’s not familiar with the Virginia Slims slogan, but the sentiment is still true.

Zeke picked this particular Italian restaurant because he’d passed by it on Giralda many times and because they had Beef Carpaccio, a family favorite. The place was very casual, with metal chairs, wood tables, exposed ductwork and a wood burning pizza oven. The food, including the Beef Carpaccio, was very good and the prices were reasonable; we all liked our Pasta dishes. I got a Porcini Mushroom Ravioli in cream sauce that was delicious, as was the Delicata Salad with figs, burrata, walnuts and arugula, which we shared.

Unfortunately, the service was just awful. There was one young kid, by himself, waiting tables, and he didn’t seem to care much. We even had to ask for the Birthday dessert of Tiramasu (even though Zeke had already told them), so I don’t know if I can recommend this restaurant. Maybe for takeout?

Monday, we ordered what is my new favorite pizza from Miami’s Best– The Italian. It’s a white pizza (no red sauce) with Fresh Mozzarella, Burrata and topped with prosciutto, arugula and cherry tomatoes with a Balsamic drizzle. We got a Medium for $22. Yum!

Thursday I met a friend for lunch at Chana Thai Kitchen, in the TJ Maxx Plaza by the Falls. We both loved our entrees- Red Curry with Tofu ($16) and Chicken with a garlic, pepper sauce (Pad Gra Tiem Prik Tai, also $16) which was a little spicy and delicious. Both came with Jasmine Rice on the side. This is a perfect, healthy option if you’re in that area. They also serve sushi and have lunch specials.

Thursday I took Wyatt to his last tennis lesson of the season at Riviera and then met A.J., Justin and Phoenix for dinner upstairs with Zeke. It was nice to spend some quality family time with them, since Justin has been working a lot and can’t usually get away. I did watch Phoenix Monday so A.J. could attend Wyatt’s Kindergarten Graduation. I’m feeling like, I’ll just blink and my first grandson will be getting his Driver’s License next. It goes by so fast!

I had my Book Club meeting at Guta’s Friday night for Atlas of the Heart. She said she was cooking vegetarian, so I brought some Onion Dip and Wavy Lays potato chips (because vegetarians shouldn’t be punished). Book Club at Guta’s is always a treat, but a bit bittersweet this time, as she has recently put her house on the market and may be moving away. We had so many appetizers- grape leaves, hummus, pita bread, onion dip, veggies and the most delicious bread (Panzanella) Salad with tomatoes and burrata- that we skipped the main course and went straight to dessert. She served Pomegranate Sangria with strawberries to drink and had a flourless chocolate cake and cookies for dessert.

And then to the Keys for Memorial Day weekend.

MY WEEK OF DINING DANGEROUSLY

I watched Desi and Lucy on Amazon Prime. It’s a documentary about their relationship, directed by comedian Amy Poehler. I really enjoyed it, but it was also, in it’s own way, sad. These two people- brilliant and talented- who started an empire (Desilu Studios), created the most beloved sitcom of all time (I Love Lucy) and who loved each other so much- just couldn’t make their marriage work. Ironically, the show about the “happily married” Ricardos didn’t reflect reality and after 20 years of marriage, they divorced. Still, the last person to talk to Desi on his death bed, besides his daughter and nurse, was Lucille Ball. Her message? “I love you, I love you, I love you.” Bittersweet.

I see trees of green, red roses too I see them bloom for me and you And I think to myself, what a wonderful world!

I hear babies cry and I watched them grow They’ll learn much more, than I’ll ever know. And I think to myself, what a wonderful world!

Yes, I think to myself, what a wonderful world!

Sung by Louis Armstrong

Up Next: Cilantro Lime Dressing

I feel like I check a lot of the boxes for this trend. Grandmother- check (times three!). Condo in the Keys- check. Likes to cook and have a cozy house- check, check. I don’t normally wear bucket hats or sweaters, however. It’s too hot for sweaters in Miami; my normal grandmotherly vibe when I pick up Wyatt from school is a long sleeved t-shirt, Lululemon leggings and a straw cowboy hat. Luckily, he’s too young to be embarrassed by my bad fashion choices.

This Coastal Grandmother trend was started by Tik Toker Lex Nicoleta and she notes the thing about this trend is you don’t need to be a Grandmother or own a Beach House to adopt the lifestyle. Anne Hathaway recently posted a photo on Instagram of herself wearing a bucket hat, big sunglasses, a white button-down shirt and khakis with the tagline: “I have been ready for coastal grandmother chic since before Tik Tok was born. May this moment never end.”

Elements of Style blog describes the trend as people who enjoy “relaxation, simple luxuries, free time, long lunches, farmer’s market, cold glasses of white wine and cashmere sweaters at a beach picnic.” Once again- the last part, not in Miami- but I like the rest of it. Lex Nicoleta even created a Spotify playlist for the trend at lexnicoleta. The decorating vibe is a “comfortable, lived-in space that is light and bright.”

Speaking of Coastal Grandmothers, I’ve been loving Grace and Frankie, the longest running Netflix series, starring Jane Fonda and Lily Tomlin. It’s like the Odd Couple, but with women who have been left by their husbands to marry each other. It’s hysterical and I’m on Season 4 of 7 Seasons. The last Season starts now and has an appearance by Dolly Parton (remember the three of them in 9 to 5?) in the final episode.

I was happy I had the Keys and our boat, ‘Bout TIme, to quarantine to when I had Covid. The hardest part of having Covid was the isolation! I missed people, I missed human interaction, I missed my grandsons. Once I got it, Zeke and I hung out together. The only after effect I’ve noticed was being extremely tired. We both went to bed earlier than usual and took naps. This week I played tennis four days in a row, so I guess I’m back in business. It was hot out there though!

I read The Paris Apartment while quarantining for my Book Club. I don’t really recommend it- found the writing a little lazy- but it was a page-turner (or page clicker, as I read it on my Kindle.) Elizabeth in my Book Club had a lovely French meal at our Book Club meeting, with French wines, cheeses, a salad with berries and a delicious Coq au Vin du Blanc (with white wine instead of red), mashed potatoes and a Pineapple Upside Down cupcake for dessert. Tres bien!

Our next book is Atlas of the Heart, by PHD and TED talk speaker Brene Brown. It’s a large, pretty-cover book which touts: “Mapping Meaningful Connection and the Language of Human Experience”. That’s quite a mouthful to be put on a cover! It seems to be an encyclopedia of human emotions. I’m not quite sure about it yet as I’ve just started- it is a New York Times bestseller. Stay tuned.

The day I tested negative, I read in the New York Times that more than half of all Americans have had Covid. This was discovered by finding the antibodies in their blood, so some who’ve had it never even knew they were positive. Most of the people I know have now had Covid at least once and more people are getting it daily. According to my sister Elise, a nurse, there is a new wave that is rapidly rising throughout Miami. I really thought we would be done with this by now, but sadly, we are not.

I cooked a lot when I had Covid, mostly out of boredom. I turned leftover ham into Ham Croquettas. A major project, but I froze the excess. I used the ham bone to make Split Pea Soup- my favorite. And I turned the Arugula from Empower Farms into Pesto. Did you know, you can use other greens to make pesto? Spinach, cilantro and parsley, for example, can all be used to make pesto. Changing the green, will of course change the taste. I love the traditional Pesto with basil, but it’s nice to have alternatives. I used the eggplant from Empower Farms to make my Josie’s Pickled Eggplant, something she always kept in her fridge to serve as an antipasto and sauteed the cute pittypat squashes for a side dish.

Since I was bored, I applied to be on Check Please! It’s a show with Chef Michelle Bernstein on PBS where three people from South Florida pick their favorite restaurant and the other two people on the show visit and eat there. After they’ve all tried the recommended restaurants, they get together at the end of the show and give their opinions. I recommended Shriver’s Bar-B-Que in Homestead, Island Grill in Islamorada (home of the Tuna Nachos) and Hobo’s Cafe in Key Largo. Fingers crossed I get picked.

We ate at Hobo’s Cafe in Key Largo last week because I craved a hamburger. It was a funny thing with Covid, my body told me exactly what it wanted me to eat. It wasn’t junk, carbs or sweets but iron (specifically beets) and protein (specifically red meat), so hence the burger. I wish my body would tell me what to eat on a Daily Basis, not just when I’m sick. I’m all ears, body!

I got the Sloppy Hobo Burger at Hobo’s; I cut it in half and took half home. It was a really good, but huge, burger that came with delicious, waffle fries! It normally comes with coleslaw, onion rings, sauteed mushrooms, provolone cheese, lettuce, tomato, onions and potato straws on the burger and BBQ sauce on the side. I got the coleslaw and onion rings on the side, as it would have been enormous and too sloppy to eat. Our waitress told us there is a little old lady who comes in once a month and gets that burger and when she lifts it up to her face, you can’t see her anymore! She said she takes her a half hour to eat, but she finishes the whole thing.

And that is why she only comes in once a month!

said our waitress.

Another place I would recommend in the Keys is Avenue Subs, where we got our subs to take out on the boat. We got a Roast Beef Sub and an Italian Sub and they were both excellent. The roast beef was sliced thin and the meat was piled on thick! The only thing I would say is to get the sliced tomatoes and onions on the side if you’re not eating it right away, so as to not make your sub soggy. No one wants a soggy sub!

I heard from the editor of Coral Gables Magazine about my Morris Lapidus in Coral Gables article. It took me six months to write and involved a lot of research. He said it was “very interesting and very thorough.” He invited me to a Coral Gables magazine’s 4-year anniversary party at the Coral Gables Museum last Thursday. When I saw him, I asked if “very thorough” was code for “boring”. He said no and that he liked the article. I still have to write a Driving Tour to go with it and it’s an “evergreen” article, meaning it can be run at any time, since the information isn’t time sensitive. Fingers crossed again. Thanks to Jeanette Slesnick for the photo!

For those of you watching the Kentucky Derby, I hope your horse wins. Fingers crossed. And to all the mothers out there, Happy Mother’s Day!

We all live in a Yellow Submarine.

The Beatles

Up Next: Josie’s Pickled Eggplant

One, was go to the dentist. Since I already was going to be tortured in the dental chair, I decided to go all the way and weigh myself before I went. I was feeling skinnier than normal and my weight was… not awful. Definitely above pre-COVID weight, but not as bad as it could have been.

“It’s going to be a blood bath,” I announced to the new Dental Hygientist about to embark into the task of cleaning my teeth. I wore a black t-shirt for the occasion. I liked the old Dental Hygienist (Mimi) but she had an unfortunate habit of asking you pressing questions while her hands were in your mouth.

When the new hygienist checked my charts, it had actually been 2 years since my last visit to the dentist.

“Do you want numbing cream?” she asked.

Definitely! I started thinking I should’ve tried to locate that stray Xanax in my bathroom medicine cabinet, to deal with the mounting anxiety I was feeling. Even with the numbing cream, the scraping on my teeth and below the gums was painful, so she moved onto a gel, squirted in between my teeth with a needle. This helped somewhat to relieve the pain, but she wasn’t even able to finish cleaning my teeth, so I have to return for an encore visit.

It was fortuitous that I’d weighed myself that morning, because that night, after a big meal at my Book Club, my stomach started rumbling and I couldn’t sleep. A stomach bug that Wyatt had gotten and then Christopher and Courtney contracted, finally bit me. I was supposed to babysit Liam on Friday, but texted Courtney at 3 a.m. telling her I was sick. And I had to cancel a Kentucky Derby Party I’d planned for Saturday afternoon.

The red roses, giant bottle of Makers Mark and rows of polished silver serving trays taunted me, with the Run for the Roses party that was no longer to be. I hadn’t gotten the bug as bad as Courtney (who had thrown up all night and couldn’t even get out of bed), but I was worried about being contagious and spreading it to my guests. I’d also made food for the party- Pickled Black Eyed Pea Dip and Sugar Cookies in the shape of red roses- and I was worried the stomach bug might be transferred via the food, which is how those Noravirus get spread on Cruise Ships. I didn’t want my first party back to be a Super Spreader event.

Since I’d weighed myself, I knew exactly how much weight I lost when I next stepped on the scale Saturday morning. I’d only lost a lousy one and a half pounds! I felt better Saturday morning and immediately regretted cancelling the party.

Do you think I did the right thing?

I asked Zeke.

“It’s a little late now,” he said.

My sisters, Kelley and Elise, assured me I had done the right thing and they beat it out of Miami- Elise to Melbourne, Kelley to the Keys- with news of the cancellation. It worked out for Elise because she was able to spend time with her youngest son James, on his way home from college in Nashville. I did feel bad for Kelley, as she’d taken much time to Cricket (it’s like sewing, but with paper) all the horses in the Kentucky Derby- silk colors, names and all. A major procrastinator who thrives on pressure, she was so proud of herself for having had finished the horses two days early.

I dressed up in a hat and pearls and drug myself downstairs for the Kentucky Derby’s main race. I made myself a Mint Julep, reasoning mint and sugar was good for my tummy troubles and bourbon was medicinal; it tasted just fine. People who were supposed to attend the party sent photos in their hats and it made me sad. A year of avoiding people, places and things to prevent getting COVID 19 and I got felled by a silly stomach bug. It was going to be my first party (most people were vaccinated) back since the whole Pandemic hit.

Kelley and I were scheduled to leave for Cassadaga, a town full of psychics near Orlando, on Sunday. My Book Club wanted to go, but before planning the trip, I wanted to vet the psychic who had been recommended by a friend and check out the B & B where we would stay. I wasn’t sure if Kelley would cancel our trip, out of fear of contracting the stomach bug. She didn’t, but she did come into my house and immediately wash her hands and offer her bigger and more aerated car to drive in.

We had the B & B to ourselves, which was lovely and we sat out on the balcony overlooking moss-covered trees and a sweet gazebo, sipping wine we’d brought from home and snacking on cheese and Trader Joe’s crackers. The psychic Lou Gates we were going to see is a medium who sees spirits and can put you in touch with people who have passed away. His own spirit guide is a 6’3″ guy named Jeff, with long black hair, which kind of cracked me up. I asked Kelley whom she would like to talk to and she said our great aunt Josie, since she was the most recent family member to enter the club of the Dearly Departed and could give us the 411 on the rest of the family.

I said I’d like to talk to Nanny, my Italian grandmother who died suddenly the year before my Dad. While she drove me crazy in real life, I missed her (surprisingly) a lot after she passed away. I also had moved into her house in the Gables, with all her stuff. Now, that I’m a grandmother, I have experienced the unconditional love a grandparent feels for their grandchildren- especially the first born (which I am).

Neither of us said our Dad, the larger-than-life (but small in stature) figure who passed away 19 years ago, but wouldn’t you know, that’s who appeared at our readings. Just like my Dad to crash a party he wasn’t invited to. And perhaps fate was guiding my stomach bug and subsequent cancellation of the Kentucky Derby Party, as one of the potential guests ended up (unbeknowest to them) having COVID.

Dr. Lou Gates told me that when I walked in, he felt immediately that I was ungrounded, but that was a good thing. That my life had been in service to others and I had no more Life Lessons to learn. That when I’m 64, the spirits are going to give me a credit card (virtual, I’m assuming) and I can charge away and do exactly what I want with my life. That I shouldn’t start anything now that I didn’t want to still be doing at the age of 64. He also said said I shouldn’t be in Florida (I told him that wasn’t negotiable given children/grandchildren living here), that I should be no farther south than Gainesville. He saw me in Oregon, Washington State or Italy. And that, by the time I was 64, I would no longer be in this house.

Will you still need me, will you still feed me when I’m 64?

The Beatles

“Letting the days go by…”

Last week was a week that felt surprisingly normal to me.

I looked at my calendar and instead of the normal blank white space of these three last months, I had meetings, parties, a massage and babysitting penciled in. I had my Book Club over for our meeting/dinner Tuesday night, attended an end-of-the year party for my tennis team (celebrating winning B-1), had my first massage in three months and went out to breakfast, lunch and dinner at restaurants in Key Largo over the weekend.

Best of all, Friday night I found out that my newest grandchild is going to be a boy! Yipee! Courtney and Christopher, married last November are expecting a baby boy (Liam James) next November, close to my birthday. The gender reveal party, via Zoom, was in Tallahassee, with Courtney’s Dad, sister and nieces attending. As they cut into the icing that revealed the cake’s blue interior, my Mom, A.J., Wyatt, Chris’s Dad and his best friend Devin were all there for the happy news. I can’t wait to see his sweet little face.

Zeke and I went out to celebrate afterwards at one of our favorite Key Largo spots, The Pilot House. While we wore masks to our table and the servers did as well, none of the patrons were wearing masks and young adults, who apparently hadn’t seen each other in a while, were high-fiving and hugging. It was heart warming (they were so happy to see each other) and horrifying (there’s still a global pandemic), all at the same time.

In the Keys, life certainly seems back to normal, in a way that didn’t feel at all safe. Basically, it’s nuts!

The weekend after the Keys opened to non-residents, restaurants were slightly busy, but this past weekend it seemed like everyone and their mother decided they’d had enough of being stuck at home and decended on the Keys like unmasked locusts. Traffic was horrific, the waterways were packed with boaters and, restaurants filled to capacity. The Keys has decided to leave it up to individual businesses whether to require patrons to wear masks. Most do not. I expect a spike of corona cases in the Keys in the next couple weeks.

On Sunday, we tried three different restaurants (Shipwrecks, Buzzard’s Roost and The Big Chill) for lunch with outdoor seating. They were all packed. We ended up at The Catch, which not very full but also not outside. I gobbled my tuna poke and tried to get out of there ASAP, which was not a relaxing dining experience.

Week of dinners last week:

• Monday Radicchio salad and lentils. Meatless Monday and was trying out recipes for my Book Club dinner.

• Tuesday Book Club dinner at my house (see previous post). Appetizers were Sliced Radishes with Vanilla Butter (Alex Raij’s), Cheddar biscuits (The Splendid Table). Dinner: Chicken Marabella (Silver Palate), with Make Ahead Goat Cheese Mashed Potatoes (Ina Garden) and Radicchio Salad (Kitchn) with olives and sliced Parmesan. Dessert: French Vanilla Ice Cream with candied oranges and Cornmeal Nut Biscotti (The Last Course) .

• Wednesday Met my sister Kelley for drinks at Riviera CC (her first venture out). Zeke and I got sushi, which was really good.

• Thursday Roast Salmon with Miso Butter and Radish Salad with Jasmine Rice. A Food and Wine recipe, this wins as dinner of the week, even though I don’t like salmon. I will be featuring this recipe, along with other Food and Wine recipes in a future blog post.

• Friday Happy Hour at the Pilot House. Conch Fritters, Tuna Nachos and a Harvey Fish Sandwich. All yummy!
• Saturday Key West Pink Shrimp with Jerk seasoning and Mango salsa and Rice Pilaf. This was a close second for dinner of the week.

• Sunday Grilled Ribs with Memphis style rub, roasted Brussel Sprouts, baked beans, leftover rice, homemade pickles.

Coronavirus cases are climbing in 22 states, including, Florida. Last Saturday, new cases surged 35% over the previous day. It was the third record jump in three days and it can’t all be explained away with more testing. As my friend Sharon texted me: “Geez, I am over this crap!” I texted back: “Yes, but it’s not over with us.”

Sad news, Aragon 101, a cookware store in Coral Gables with curated kitchen items and fun cooking classes, is closing. I met Erica Guzman, the owner, on the Tour of Kitchens committee and always enjoyed talking to her, visiting the store and especially attending the wonderful cooking classes with various talented chefs. Books and Books on Miami Beach is also closing, due to high rent and the ever-shrinking Miami Herald is relocating buildings, finding it’s easier (and cheaper) for employees to work remotely.

My sister Elise and I were discussing a friend of hers who lost her job with a cruise line. But, the thing is, it was a job she hated, so this may be an opportunity to find a job she loves. And we agreed that while some jobs have evaporated, others have probably opened up. Or perhaps people are discovering a hobby they’ve taken up while in quarantine that they can turn into a side hustle or even a new business. As for me, the coronavirus has crystalized for me what I miss and what I don’t. I miss traveling.

Zeke and I had planned to go to London next year, so I found a great deal for a hotel in the Bloomsbury section that I booked through Travelzoo. It’s fully refundable and I need something to look forward to, even if it’s next year! I’m also planning a road trip for when we drop Lauren off in D.C. in August to Delaware, Maryland and West Virginia, three of the six states I haven’t seen.

I read an article (T & L) about what was a safer way to travel- by car or plane. The conclusion was driving is probably safer because you’re able to control your interaction with other people more than flying. Flying, you may encounter crowded airports, long security lines and then, of course, the hours on the plane itself with people you don’t know. Someone on my tennis team’s husband recently had coronavirus, which he contracted on a flight from Colorado. She was on the same flight, they both had masks on and her husband got it, but she didn’t. Coronavirus is a weird bird.

So, as much as I would for life to go back to normal, it hasn’t yet, at least not completely. I got my convertible top fixed to stop the leaking, we’re in the process of getting our roof fixed, the rat hasn’t been spotted lately, the cat’s had another catastrophe (inflamed claw) after a cat fight and I’ve just about given up on trying to make sourdough bread. Emma’s moved out and Lauren’s away, so the house is quiet. I have to remind myself, even when life was “normal”, it was never perfect and I still have summer, road trips, babysitting Wyatt and a new grandson to look forward to.

I love this speech from Our Town, given by Emily, a character who’s died and comes back to her hometown of Grover’s Corners for one last, ordinary day. (Emily was also on the short list of possible girl’s names for Chris and Courtney). So many times, we don’t appreciate what’s around us until it’s gone. So let’s savor and lean into whatever time we have left of this strange and unprecedented period of our lives.

Lets really look at one another…It goes so fast. We don’t have time to look at one another. I didn’t realize. So all that was going on and we never noticed. Wait! One more look. Goodbye, goodbye world. Goodbye to clocks ticking… and Mama’ sunflowers. And food and coffee. And new ironed dresses and hot baths… and sleeping and waking up. Oh earth, you are too wonderful for anybody to realize you. Do any humans beings ever realize life while they live it, every every minute?

Thorton Wilder, Our Town

Up Next: Mango Mania and Food and Wine Recipes I Love