I was trying to think of why being a grandparent is so much more joyful than being a parent was. It’s not that I don’t have hopes, dreams and aspirations for my grandchildren, it’s just that there isn’t as much attachment to the outcome as when I was a parent. With our own children, there’s so much invested in their upbringing- from trying to improve on our own experiences growing up, to trying to accomplish feats and accomplishments (through our children) we may not have realized- that it’s a very complicated relationship. It’s also one fraught with constant fear.

They say when you have a child, it’s like having your heart existing outside of your body. With grandchildren, it’s kind of like their heart is part of your own heart, so there’s less separation and anxiety. It’s just a much sweeter, purer and less complicated love. Honestly, I can’t explain it adequately. It just needs to be experienced.

I’m watching The Last Movie Stars on HBO Max and Joanne Woodward explained having grandchildren as, when you have grandchildren, you know the only thing you have to do that day is to listen to them, because there won’t be endless opportunities. As a mother, I often felt I was abandoning my ambition and career opportunity by staying home with the kids. And, when I worked, there was always the fear of missing milestones in their lives. You are constantly told as a parent: “they’re only young once”, so any time spent away from them seems like a sin. There is always guilt, one way or the other, and with grandchildren, there’s just sweet surrender. And indulgence.

The Last Movies Stars was great, by the way. I highly recommend it. I am reading Bittersweet for my Book Club. It’s interesting, written by Susan Cain, the author of Quiet (about introverts), but a little heavy reading for the Summer. We are meeting at the end of the month for a meeting at my house. I am already contemplating what Bittersweet Foods to serve.

We returned from Hawaii and I was immediately thrown into “Gigi” mode, as Christopher and Liam were at our house. He and his wife Courtney moved from Steamboat Springs to Tallahassee and they were in Miami to pick up stuff they had left in storage (and at my house). So, I got to babysit Liam for about a half a day, while they picked up the U-Haul in Vero Beach.

Liam and I did a modified Gigi Camp. We played, swam in the pool, I gave him a bath, dressed him in his Hawaiian shirt and we listened to Hawaiian music. I also let him color and when the crayon hit the paper and made a mark, he squealed in delight. I think he may be a budding artist! Alas, they’re gone now but I’m planning a trip to Tallahassee in the Fall, when it’s cooler.

Wyatt and I also did Gigi Camp, starting the next Monday. The Shark Week Shirt and Hawaiian shirt I got him in Hawaii were both too small. He’s six, but wearing size eight! Of course our theme was Hawaii. I showed him a map of the Hawaiian Islands and the four islands Zeke and I had visited. We learned Hawaiian words, listened to Hawaiian songs, watched Hawaiian movies and, of course, made Hawaiian food.

The first word I taught Wyatt was the most Hawaiian of words- Aloha, which means Hello, Goodbye and Love. It literally translates to “Breath of Life”; it means living in the present and treating each other, and nature, with love and respect. Aloha means living in harmony and they talked a lot about the “Aloha Spirit” in Hawaii and how they treat everyone as Ohana (family). Our bus driver Denis, on the Big Island, greeted us each morning with “Hello cousins, brudah, sister, antie, uncles.” It’s hard to argue with a culture whose philosophy is “Hang Loose” (with pinkie and thumb extended). Quite different than Miami!

I started Wyatt off with Pancakes, served with Coconut Syrup and Ube spread, two breakfast items we encountered in Hawaii. He loved this and had it every day for breakfast for the rest of Gigi Camp. We made a mold for a volcano kit I’d bought and I told him how Bop and I visited the Volcano National Park in Hawaii, where there’s still an active volcano (Kilauea). The first night we made Loco Moco (normally a breakfast item) for dinner and it was actually a clue that night on Jeopardy. I got it!

Tuesday was a rainy day so we went to the library, to the movies and Wyatt painted his volcano. Dinner was a Pupu Platter, which I figured any six-year old would appreciate, if for no other reason the name. While Pupu (appetizer) Platters normally consist of Egg Rolls, Spareribs and other (often fried) items, our had Grilled Chicken Sausage and Pineapple Skewers, Grilled Shishito Peppers, Steamed Shrimp Dumplings and Meatballs with Teriyaki. It was all delicious and Wyatt loved it. I taught him two new words- Ono for delicious and Ohana for family. We wore tags identifying ourself as Tutu (Grandma) and Keike (Child).

Wednesday was a big day because Wyatt’s cousin Gracie (only 2 weeks older) was coming over. We went for a walk, collected plumeria flowers and made a lei to give Gracie as an honorary member of Gigi Camp. Gracie came over, got a tattoo, and went swimming. As the grand finale, they erupted the volcano (apparently a disappointment to Wyatt) and made their own pizza for dinner. I made a Hawaiian Pizza– pineapple and ham- which they bravely tried but didn’t like. They did enjoy their own, plain cheese pizzas.

The last day of Gigi Camp went out with a bang! We had a picnic at Matheson Hammock (Chicken Salad Sandwich for me, leftover Pizza for Wyatt), Wyatt climbed trees, we then visited Fairchild Tropical Garden and the Lego exhibit. We came home, went swimming, where Wyatt insisted I get my hair wet (I’m not sure why, but he said it was more fun) and then we met Zeke, Emma and Gui for dinner. Wyatt ordered a Shirley Temple with extra cherries and got a California Roll. His Mom picked him up and I breathed a sigh of relief.

It was only four days, so I owe Wyatt a couple more.

The first year I attempted Gigi Camp, Wyatt was about three and I agreed to take him for a whole week. I way overestimated my patience and stamina for that age! After that, his Mom and I decided I would take him for one day, per years he was. Whenever I got tired during this Gigi Camp, I reminded myself he’s only six once and I’m not getting any younger. I’m also sure when he’s 14, he’s probably not going to want to spend two weeks with his Gigi, so I have to take advantage while he’s still excited to be with me.

In Hawaii, they have a beautiful tradition when someone dies of scattering the ashes at sea and then laying flower leis into the water, that float away. We saw this happen on our way to the North Shore in Oahu. I’m now re-thinking my plans for being buried vs. cremated. On the plus side, it’s cheaper and I would take up less space. On the minus side, there would be no place my family could come visit me. Not that I care, but they might. Maybe scatter my ashes in the water and plant a tree? Ashes to ashes…

Life is fleeting, it is beautiful and it’s bittersweet. And they’re only young once (I guess there is some kind of Grandma Guilt!), so we need to savor these moments while we can.

Last night in my dreams, I saw your face again, We were there in the sun, On a white, sandy beach of Hawaii.

White Sandy Beach of Hawaii by Israel Kamakawiwo’ole (Iz)

Up Next: Turkey Burger with a Bang

Hawaiian Food itself is a bit of a mixed plate, with five distinct styles reflecting the history of its settlement. There are influences from Polynesian, European and American, New England (missionaries), Whalers and Immigrants (including China, Japan, Korea, The Philippines, Puerto Rico and Portugal). All of these distinct styles were fused together to form what is now known as “Hawaiian Regional Cuisine.”

Coconuts

The one food I remember when I visited Hawaii as a child were these delicious, fluffy pancakes, served with Coconut Syrup. Coconut syrup is still popular in Hawaii and I covered my waffles with it, and topped it with toasted coconut and chopped macadamia nuts. Heavenly! I served my grandson the syrup with his pancakes for breakfast and he loved it.

Macadamia Nuts

The other thing I remembered about our visit was touring the Mauna Loa Macadamia Nut Factory and seeing how they harvested and processed the nuts. On our trip, we stopped at a Tropical Farm where they had macadamia nuts of every flavor, from savory- onion and garlic- to sweet- coffee and cinnamon- to sample, and of course buy.

Pineapple

I will never forget my Dad stopping on the side of the road and plucking a pineapple out of a field. All us kids thought we were going to get arrested! But, back at the hotel, when we sliced it up and ate it, it was the best pineapple I’d ever eaten. I had pineapple every day of our trip to the Hawaii and it was always delicious. Maui, with their sweet Maui Gold pineapples, is especially known for its pineapples. The pineapple business used to a lucrative one for Hawaii, but now most of the pineapples grown are used locally.

Fresh Fruit

Many of the Tropical Trees growing in Hawaii are the same as we have in Miami, so there are an abundance of Papayas, Mangoes, Bananas and Lychees available. They made repeat appearances at our breakfast buffets, which was much appreciated.

Lilikoi

Lilikoi deserves a special mention, since I encountered it all over the Hawaiian Isles. I had this delicious, yellow colored jelly at breakfast and asked what it was. Lilikoi, or Passionfruit and it’s used in many dishes in Hawaii from cocktails, (Lilikoi Martini) to desserts, like Creme Brulee. I even brought some (USDA approved) seeds home with me to plant so I can have my own Passionfruit Vine here in Miami.

Li Hing Powder

When I had a Lilikoi cocktail at Jackie Rey’s Ohaha Grill on the Big Island, the glass was rimmed with a red seasoning I couldn’t identify so I asked the bartender. what it was. She said “It’s Li Hing”, salted plums, you can find it in any local grocery store.” Indeed, she was right. It has a very distinct (possibly aquired) taste of sweet, salty and liquoricey. In Hawaii, they sprinkle it on everything, including poke, pineapple and ice cream.

Coffee

Hawaii is one of the few states in the U.S. where coffee production is a significant economic industry and it is the second largest crop grown there. Kona coffee, in particular, is a prized variety, since the elevation and the volcanic soil make for perfect growing conditions. We visited a coffee farm in Kona and sampled the coffee, which is like black gold. We also bought many bags (at $27 a pop) to bring home as gifts. Interestingly enough, I liked the coffee grown in Kauai better than the Kona coffee.

Taro

Taro, a tuber, is a staple in the Hawaiian culture and its root is mashed to make poi, a dish traditionally eaten with the fingers. I remember reading about it as a child and being disappointed when I finally tasted it on our trip. As one of our tour guides on this trip said: “It tastes like wallpaper paste.” Still, the taro plant is considered to be sacred in the Hawaiian culture and poi is a must at any Luau.

Ube

Another tuber, this one is sweeter in color, with a beautiful purple color which makes it stunning in ice cream, pancakes or bread. It can also be baked, like a sweet potato. It’s trending lately, as I’ve found Ube spread and Ube Mochi at Trader Joes.

Fresh Seafood

There’s an abundance of fresh seafood in Hawaii. What I encountered most was Ahi Tuna, (popular in poke), Ono (Wahoo) and Mahi Mahi. When I visited Hawaii with my parents and they ordered dolphin for dinner, the waiter took pains to explain we weren’t eating Flipper. My Dad told him we were from Miami and knew what dolphin was. The need to clarify the difference is probably why dolphin is now popularly known as Mahi Mahi.

Beef

There are a lot of Cattle Ranches throughout the Hawaiian Islands, so beef is plentiful and fresh. It’s used in dishes like Loco Moco– a breakfast dish which is a hamburger patty over white rice, with a fried egg and gravy. We also had Hawaiian Burgers (with grilled pineapple) and Teriyaki Steak– one of my favorites.

Spam

Spam became popular after World War II, when it was served to G.I.’s. It then became a staple in Hawaiian food, either fried and served with white rice or on a sushi roll known as musubi. I had it in a Mixed Plate and in Fried Rice; it was actually quite tasty. Spam, a processed meat product, is relatively inexpensive and non-perishable, making it an easy and affordable food for Hawaiians.

Tacos

Fish tacos are the fuel of surfers, so they are obviously a popular Hawaiian food, but I saw tacos of all types- pork, shrimp, chicken, mushroom and tofu- on the menus in Hawaii.

Macaroni Salad

This creamy and delicious side is seen all over Hawaii. When I ordered Spicy Poke, it came with two scoops of rice and macaroni salad. Can you say carb overload? The delivery person said I hadn’t indicated a side, so he just brought it with the side people normally order- macaroni salad. It’s a staple of the Plate Lunch, which originated with Plantation workers in Hawaii. The bland creamy dish balances out the salty, sweet and saucy proteins served on a Plate Lunch.

Huli Huli Chicken

This is a whole chicken that’s been marinated in a terayaki-like sauce, put on a rotisserie and grilled over mesquite wood. Huli means turn in Hawaiian, so this dish means turn-turn, like the chicken does when in rotates over the fire. It is ono! In other words, delicious.

Kalua Pork

This pork has nothing to do with the coffee flavored drink, but everything to do with Hawaii. The traditional Kalua Pork was a whole pig, stuffed with hot coals, wrapped in banana leaves and buried in the ground in an Imu– an underground oven- to cook for many hours. Digging the pig out is part of the ritual at a Luau and the succulent, tender pork is served alongside many other sides. Since most people don’t have access to an Imu, a modification in cooking uses Pork Shoulder, rubbed with salt and cooked either in a Dutch Oven or Slow Cooker. Liquid Smoke seasoning adds the smokey flavor.

Sesame-Miso Dressing

This was the dressing I encountered all over Hawaii and it’s delicious! They even served it, with Spring Mix, at the Breakfast Buffet at the Prince Waikiki hotel. Salad for breakfast? Why not? It’s nutty, umami taste lends itself to many different uses.

Mai Tai

The one Tiki drink seen ALL over Hawaii, was the Mai Tai. Our favorite Mai Tai was at $20 version at the Mai Tai lounge in the historic Royal Hawaiian Hotel in Waikiki. Although they claimed to have invented the Mai Tai, there is some disputing that fact, but no disputing it was our favorite Mai Tai of our trip. Zeke kept trying Mai Tais at other places throughout our trip, but none compared. That was my first and last Mai Tai. I figured I’d had the best and wanted to stop with that.

Dole Whip

Yes, that Dole Whip you’ve had at Disney World next to the Enchanted Tiki Birds is a big dessert in Hawaii. We ate ours a Lappert’s, a famous Ice Cream shop that started in Kauai. It was exactly like the one you get at Disney World, but served with fresh chopped pineapple on top. Shaved Ice (like a snow cone) is also a big frozen treat in Hawaii, especially the Rainbow flavor, but alas, I didn’t try any. That much sugar would make me go to sleep and I didn’t want to waste any of my vacation sleeping in the middle of the day.

Of course, this article only touches on the some of the foods of Hawaii. There are so many more I didn’t get to try. I guess that just means I’ll have to go back. They say they don’t say goodbye in Hawaii but say instead, “Ahui hou kakou”- until we meet again.

Ito is an eating boy, he never get enough from fish and poi He eat everything, he don’t care what He even eat the shell from the coconut.

Ito Eats, from Blue Hawaii

Up Next: Sesame-Miso Dressing